Since being pregnant and now being a stay-at-home-mom, I have discovered a lot of TV that I never had any interest in before. Daytime reruns that I can catch up on during feedings (or when I'm just cuddling with my little bug on the couch) provide a vast array of tv I never thought I'd experience.
My new favorite shows:
The Office (Dwight Schrute is hi-larious)
Desperate Housewives
Regis and Kelly
Teen Mom/16 and pregnant
In other news, I have started swaddling Drew during the day. It instantly calms him ad he just looks around and smiles. I realllllly want to try a Woombie, but I don't know how it can be all that different than a regular swaddle.
Thursday, May 27, 2010
Wednesday, May 26, 2010
Holy Houdini!
Well, as you may have noted in my last post, Drew has figured out his hands. He's constantly pulling and tugging on his oxygen/feeding tubes. I really have to stare at him ALL DAY and swoop down at a second's notice and untangle those teeny but highly efficient fingers from the tubing. It is giving me a complex, not to mention multiple coronaries.
Last night, when I put him to sleep, I swaddled him. I swaddled him tight, to bind his hands so I could rest easy. At 5am, he was still snoozing when I got up to pee.
At 8am I started his feeding pump, and laid back down to sleep (he was asleep as well). About 10 minutes later I heard some grunting. Normal for him, and I don't get him out of bed until he starts fussing, since he usually falls back to sleep til 9am. But even after the noises stopped, I couldn't fall back asleep. So, I put my glasses back on, sat up in bed, and SURPRISE!
While he was still TIGHTLY SWADDLED, he rubbed his face against the side of his Rock and Play until he rubbed off 3 layers of medical tape, and somehow wiggled the feeding tube all of the way out of his stomach, esophagus, and nose. Formula was spilling EVERYWHERE. And when I said "Oh, no, Drew!" ...he looked up at me and started to giggle. Like it was hilarious or something. But his giggle is the BEST sound ever, so how could I not start laughing too?
Mostly, I'm insanely impressed with his face-rubbing Houdini skills.
Put a new one in, and triple taped this one too. Crossing my fingers he doesn't rip it out.
Last night, when I put him to sleep, I swaddled him. I swaddled him tight, to bind his hands so I could rest easy. At 5am, he was still snoozing when I got up to pee.
At 8am I started his feeding pump, and laid back down to sleep (he was asleep as well). About 10 minutes later I heard some grunting. Normal for him, and I don't get him out of bed until he starts fussing, since he usually falls back to sleep til 9am. But even after the noises stopped, I couldn't fall back asleep. So, I put my glasses back on, sat up in bed, and SURPRISE!
While he was still TIGHTLY SWADDLED, he rubbed his face against the side of his Rock and Play until he rubbed off 3 layers of medical tape, and somehow wiggled the feeding tube all of the way out of his stomach, esophagus, and nose. Formula was spilling EVERYWHERE. And when I said "Oh, no, Drew!" ...he looked up at me and started to giggle. Like it was hilarious or something. But his giggle is the BEST sound ever, so how could I not start laughing too?
Mostly, I'm insanely impressed with his face-rubbing Houdini skills.
Put a new one in, and triple taped this one too. Crossing my fingers he doesn't rip it out.
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
Zoinks! Jinkies! ...and Scooby Snacks
Tummy time can go one of two ways in ths house. Either I put Drew on his little Buddha belly and he is giggly... or I lay him down and he screams like the world is coming to an abrupt end and he doesn't even get one last diaper change. How tragic for him.
So, I have been taking advantage of the boppy, since it missed out on the breastfeeding non-adventures. He likes the boppy, which is awesome. But for the last week... without fail... he has managed to ARMY CRAWL himself up over the boppy and like, a foot across the floor. It takes awhile, and usually ends with him frustrated... but seriously? He hasn't even rolled over yet! He's only 11 weeks! It is amazing to watch. He systematically wiggles one leg/arm, then the other. And he grunts and groans like a fat man in a pie eating contest the whole time too. But then... at the very end... he lifts up his head and smiles. My baby is a genius.
Afterwards I put him in his crack-swing, so I can get 45 minutes to pee, shower, and eat. I love baby crack. The swing, the tv, and our curtains rustling in a breeze (ok, rustling because the ceiing fan is on high) all fascinate him to no end. THANK YOU, ELECTRICITY!
He has also discovered his hands can DO things. Namely, pull out his oxygen and feeding tubes. Its gotten so bad we have started swadding him at night again. He also tries holding his bottle by himself. Which would be cute if he could. but he can't so he just gets angry.
AND, he is starting to sleep straigt through the night! I didn't get up with him at all from 11pm-8:45am last night! Yay for sleep!
In other news, Justin and I are very excited to say we have worked out our summer visitation and will be getting Parker from mid-July to the beginning of September. To prepare ourselves, I bought 2 new Scooby movies, a Scooby coloring book, and some "big kid" sippy cups. Yeah, as long as that little dude is around, its a Scooby-fest. He lives for Scooby. Or, as he calls him, "Booby-doo."
Ooops, I hear the call of my slave driver. AKA, Drew has woken up from the crack-swing induced nap.
So, I have been taking advantage of the boppy, since it missed out on the breastfeeding non-adventures. He likes the boppy, which is awesome. But for the last week... without fail... he has managed to ARMY CRAWL himself up over the boppy and like, a foot across the floor. It takes awhile, and usually ends with him frustrated... but seriously? He hasn't even rolled over yet! He's only 11 weeks! It is amazing to watch. He systematically wiggles one leg/arm, then the other. And he grunts and groans like a fat man in a pie eating contest the whole time too. But then... at the very end... he lifts up his head and smiles. My baby is a genius.
Afterwards I put him in his crack-swing, so I can get 45 minutes to pee, shower, and eat. I love baby crack. The swing, the tv, and our curtains rustling in a breeze (ok, rustling because the ceiing fan is on high) all fascinate him to no end. THANK YOU, ELECTRICITY!
He has also discovered his hands can DO things. Namely, pull out his oxygen and feeding tubes. Its gotten so bad we have started swadding him at night again. He also tries holding his bottle by himself. Which would be cute if he could. but he can't so he just gets angry.
AND, he is starting to sleep straigt through the night! I didn't get up with him at all from 11pm-8:45am last night! Yay for sleep!
In other news, Justin and I are very excited to say we have worked out our summer visitation and will be getting Parker from mid-July to the beginning of September. To prepare ourselves, I bought 2 new Scooby movies, a Scooby coloring book, and some "big kid" sippy cups. Yeah, as long as that little dude is around, its a Scooby-fest. He lives for Scooby. Or, as he calls him, "Booby-doo."
Ooops, I hear the call of my slave driver. AKA, Drew has woken up from the crack-swing induced nap.
Saturday, May 22, 2010
We have progress!
YAY!
So, Thursday May 20th Drew had his 6week follow up with his pulminologist after being discharged from JHH. We loaded up the car, and headed to Baltimore. I drove, so of course Justin and I started fighting before we even got there. He is such a back seat driver when I know what I'm doing, and he falls asleep when I get lost. LOL.
Anywho, so we got there 5 minutes late after I had gotten all turned around (it wasn't in the main hospital, it was about 4 blocks away). They took us right back to vitals. Drew is 11 pounds and 7oz, and 22.5inches long. He is HUGE! I can't believe how much he is growing!!!
The pulminary fellow (no, not man. Fellow. As in she is doing her fellowship) came back to talk to us. We discussed how he was doing, and our concerns. She asked us about a billion questions, and had me fill out a "1 is none of the time, 5 is all of the time" questionairre about how Drew's condition is effecting my life as his care taker. Then she left the room to go talk to Dr. McGlinchy.
Insert battle royale here. Justin and I don't necessarily see eye to eye on Drew's progress. He has severe asthma (he technically died once from it) and has seen a pulmiologist for years. Ergo, he believes himself quite the expert. But I am home with Drew more, ad see different things. I.e, less episodes during the day (when I am home) and them really only occurring at night (when Justin is there to see them). Hence you can see why he thinks they happen all the time. But, he has taught me some things about breathing to look out for, so all in all, our knowledge combined makes us a good team.
So, Dr. McGlinchy and the fellow came back in (I swear I can't remember her name) to talk to us again. It was decided that we would take Drew off the apnea monitor, as it was alarming even when he was obviously breathing. However, they are changing the settings on his pulse oximeter to alarm at 90 now instead of 80, so it will be much more sensitive. He will remain on a 1/4 liter of oxygen via nasal canula, and of course, on his feeding pump as well. He will go back in August for another sleep study, and they are reviewing his LAST sleep study another time to see if he needs an MRI.
They also decided he has "silent reflux" which means even though he doesn't throw up/spit up, the reflux is still happening. So, we have started him on Zantac. Oh joy.
I am soooooo happy that we are heading in the right direction though! One machine down, and 3 to go! I cannot wait!!!
And on a side note, I am looking up plane tickets now to get Parker up here for the summer! And, today is Justin's, Jason's (his twin), and Isaiah (our nephew's) birthdays. So, a Happy 25th to the olders, and a Happy 1st to the younger! Love you all! Life is good :)
So, Thursday May 20th Drew had his 6week follow up with his pulminologist after being discharged from JHH. We loaded up the car, and headed to Baltimore. I drove, so of course Justin and I started fighting before we even got there. He is such a back seat driver when I know what I'm doing, and he falls asleep when I get lost. LOL.
Anywho, so we got there 5 minutes late after I had gotten all turned around (it wasn't in the main hospital, it was about 4 blocks away). They took us right back to vitals. Drew is 11 pounds and 7oz, and 22.5inches long. He is HUGE! I can't believe how much he is growing!!!
The pulminary fellow (no, not man. Fellow. As in she is doing her fellowship) came back to talk to us. We discussed how he was doing, and our concerns. She asked us about a billion questions, and had me fill out a "1 is none of the time, 5 is all of the time" questionairre about how Drew's condition is effecting my life as his care taker. Then she left the room to go talk to Dr. McGlinchy.
Insert battle royale here. Justin and I don't necessarily see eye to eye on Drew's progress. He has severe asthma (he technically died once from it) and has seen a pulmiologist for years. Ergo, he believes himself quite the expert. But I am home with Drew more, ad see different things. I.e, less episodes during the day (when I am home) and them really only occurring at night (when Justin is there to see them). Hence you can see why he thinks they happen all the time. But, he has taught me some things about breathing to look out for, so all in all, our knowledge combined makes us a good team.
So, Dr. McGlinchy and the fellow came back in (I swear I can't remember her name) to talk to us again. It was decided that we would take Drew off the apnea monitor, as it was alarming even when he was obviously breathing. However, they are changing the settings on his pulse oximeter to alarm at 90 now instead of 80, so it will be much more sensitive. He will remain on a 1/4 liter of oxygen via nasal canula, and of course, on his feeding pump as well. He will go back in August for another sleep study, and they are reviewing his LAST sleep study another time to see if he needs an MRI.
They also decided he has "silent reflux" which means even though he doesn't throw up/spit up, the reflux is still happening. So, we have started him on Zantac. Oh joy.
I am soooooo happy that we are heading in the right direction though! One machine down, and 3 to go! I cannot wait!!!
And on a side note, I am looking up plane tickets now to get Parker up here for the summer! And, today is Justin's, Jason's (his twin), and Isaiah (our nephew's) birthdays. So, a Happy 25th to the olders, and a Happy 1st to the younger! Love you all! Life is good :)
Friday, May 14, 2010
Mother's Day
Sunday, May 9, 2010 was my first Mother's Day. I got to spend the entire day with Drew, my parents, and my little sister (and her boyfriend). It was a very nice, relaxing day. We went to church, then had a little barbecue at my parent's house (Justin had to work all day).
I knew I wasn't getting a gift from Drew (erm, Justin. Drew doesn't have a job) but I was okay with that. We have more important things to be putting our money towards. But it really made me sit down and think: what is a mother?
The first definition I came across was "a term for the person having authority, status, and function as the female parent." Oh, okay, well thanks for clearing that up, Dictionary.com. The next was "someone that gives rise to or exercises protecting care over someone else." Much better. But how does this pertain to me?
I carried Drew for 9 months. And to be honest - while I loved him - I never really felt a "real" connection to him during that time. I loved every kick, and every hiccup... but it hadn't set in that it wasn't a cheeseburger but a baby in there. Then I went into labor. With every contraction I panicked a little more. I have to have a lisence to drive (and to be honest, I'm not even very good at that)... but they will just let me leave the hospital with a little, real PERSON?! Are you kidding me? How do you know I am equipped to handle that?! When I was told I was being rushed in for a c-section, I cried for MY lost experience. When I woke up and was told Drew had been taken to the NICU, I was kind of numb about it (although in my defense, I was high on morphine). But when I held that tiny little guy in my hands, I suddenly knew. This was it. This is where I was supposed to be. Through all the ups and downs of the hospitals visits, and through all the stresses that Justin and I face, I know that its all worth it.
I find myself a new person. The kind of person who adapts a Mickey Mouse-esque voice whenever I am trying to get my baby to smile. The kind of a person who can talk about a baby's bowel functions for an hour, and be proud and happy when he lets out a particularly big fart after a day of tummy troubles that left him cranky. The kind of person who can't think of a lullaby at 4am, so she paces the hallway singing "The Song That Doesn't End" (yeah, that happened last night).
All of my expectations of motherhood flew out the window the day Drew was born. And again when he was finally released from Hopkins. All I know now is that I am the kind of person who will put NOTHING before my son.
And thats the kind of person I want to be.
I knew I wasn't getting a gift from Drew (erm, Justin. Drew doesn't have a job) but I was okay with that. We have more important things to be putting our money towards. But it really made me sit down and think: what is a mother?
The first definition I came across was "a term for the person having authority, status, and function as the female parent." Oh, okay, well thanks for clearing that up, Dictionary.com. The next was "someone that gives rise to or exercises protecting care over someone else." Much better. But how does this pertain to me?
I carried Drew for 9 months. And to be honest - while I loved him - I never really felt a "real" connection to him during that time. I loved every kick, and every hiccup... but it hadn't set in that it wasn't a cheeseburger but a baby in there. Then I went into labor. With every contraction I panicked a little more. I have to have a lisence to drive (and to be honest, I'm not even very good at that)... but they will just let me leave the hospital with a little, real PERSON?! Are you kidding me? How do you know I am equipped to handle that?! When I was told I was being rushed in for a c-section, I cried for MY lost experience. When I woke up and was told Drew had been taken to the NICU, I was kind of numb about it (although in my defense, I was high on morphine). But when I held that tiny little guy in my hands, I suddenly knew. This was it. This is where I was supposed to be. Through all the ups and downs of the hospitals visits, and through all the stresses that Justin and I face, I know that its all worth it.
I find myself a new person. The kind of person who adapts a Mickey Mouse-esque voice whenever I am trying to get my baby to smile. The kind of a person who can talk about a baby's bowel functions for an hour, and be proud and happy when he lets out a particularly big fart after a day of tummy troubles that left him cranky. The kind of person who can't think of a lullaby at 4am, so she paces the hallway singing "The Song That Doesn't End" (yeah, that happened last night).
All of my expectations of motherhood flew out the window the day Drew was born. And again when he was finally released from Hopkins. All I know now is that I am the kind of person who will put NOTHING before my son.
And thats the kind of person I want to be.
Tuesday, May 11, 2010
I had a plan...
That's right. I had a plan. I didn't plan to get pregnant, but when I found out I was, Justin and I sat down, and created a plan. We were going to have our healthy baby boy. We were going to use our wonderful tax return to take a vacation, pay off some bills, and have a nice nest egg. We were going to have a happy laid back life.
I read on another blog that if you want to hear God laugh, to tell him your plans.
How true is that? There is no real way I could have planned for this. I don't get my vacation, or my nest egg. The whole tax return went towards medical supplies, and Drew's hospital stay, and trying to stay afloat. My perfect baby - who is still perfect in my opinion - is not easy, or laid back. He requires every drop of my energy and attention. I have not even read a chapter in a book since he was born in one sitting. I barely eat (and still haven't lost all my baby weight -ugh) and peeing is like an olympic event - how fast can I get it in? I still have to turn on his feeding pump every 3 hours, and I haven't slept straight through a night in 9 weeks.
But you know what? I don't care. I had a friend tell me this past weekend that she looks up to me. It touched me, but it baffles me at the same time. Yes, my life is a little crazy. Yes, I've had to learn how to insert feeding tubes, and use apnea monitors. I've spent hours checking the levels of oxygen tanks, and watching his pulse ox levels drop into danger zones. But I don't know any different. And even if I did... would that change things? I don't think it would. And I don't think any of you would do anything any differently.
Yeah, my plans might have changed. Now I only plan one day at a time, and just hope to make it through without any major events. Now my whole plan revolves around keeping Drew healthy. It might be a crazy life, but its OUR life. And I love it. And thats all I care about.
I read on another blog that if you want to hear God laugh, to tell him your plans.
How true is that? There is no real way I could have planned for this. I don't get my vacation, or my nest egg. The whole tax return went towards medical supplies, and Drew's hospital stay, and trying to stay afloat. My perfect baby - who is still perfect in my opinion - is not easy, or laid back. He requires every drop of my energy and attention. I have not even read a chapter in a book since he was born in one sitting. I barely eat (and still haven't lost all my baby weight -ugh) and peeing is like an olympic event - how fast can I get it in? I still have to turn on his feeding pump every 3 hours, and I haven't slept straight through a night in 9 weeks.
But you know what? I don't care. I had a friend tell me this past weekend that she looks up to me. It touched me, but it baffles me at the same time. Yes, my life is a little crazy. Yes, I've had to learn how to insert feeding tubes, and use apnea monitors. I've spent hours checking the levels of oxygen tanks, and watching his pulse ox levels drop into danger zones. But I don't know any different. And even if I did... would that change things? I don't think it would. And I don't think any of you would do anything any differently.
Yeah, my plans might have changed. Now I only plan one day at a time, and just hope to make it through without any major events. Now my whole plan revolves around keeping Drew healthy. It might be a crazy life, but its OUR life. And I love it. And thats all I care about.
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